Write a Sonnet
A Duck Out of Water
It will soon be plain for all to see
that my effort in this farce is forced
Oh woe, it is clear as day to me
I am as a if a beet out of *Borsht
that my effort in this farce is forced
Oh woe, it is clear as day to me
I am as a if a beet out of *Borsht
So I’ll continue each line to contrive
Little bits and awkwardly placed pieces
Meter? can’t have it all. For I must stay alive
Until the end rhyme, until it kindly releases ...
Me! - I feel badly for poor Master Willie
Who in his grave'll toss and roll -
You too should think this verse silly
As my draining patience takes it’s toll
Who in his grave'll toss and roll -
You too should think this verse silly
As my draining patience takes it’s toll
How have I have managed at my task?
Please be kind - don’t tell, don’t ask.
©JP/davh
*for those who may not know...Borsht is beet soup.
abab, cdcd, efef, gg - the gg stands for Good Grief!
Ok ... no comment :)
ReplyDeleteLaughing, Jules. With you, always with you.
ReplyDeleteI love the angst that sonnet writing produces in some people - you and Margo for a start! I think there's an extra "to" in this line !So I’ll continue to each line to contrive." and IMHO the first one should go. Likewise, an extra 'll in "Who’ll in his grave'll toss and roll" and again, think the first one could go. I hope you don't mind the comment.
ReplyDeleteFor the first 10 or 20 sonnets any students of mine write, I have them graph the blank page before they start:
ReplyDeleteU / U / U / U / U /
A
B
A
B
C
D
C
D
E
F
E
F
G
G
Helps to internalize the form, then they can start dropping the rhyme entirely and taking liberties as they like. Was helpful to me with first sonnets, too, in getting comfortable enough for it to not feel heavy handed/like the form was dictating the content vs. content thriving within form. Steal it if you want. : )
Since it was like pulling teeth, I'm glad you had laughing gas.
ReplyDeleteJules, I know how you feel, I know how you feel. I got a good laugh out of this, be sure.
ReplyDeletePamela
Wow! The more I look around other people's sites the more I realise how much some of you guys know about writing. I don't even know what a sonnet is really, except that now I know this is one. I think I might try some poetry soon, but not quite yet. Good stuff Jules, very clever. :)
ReplyDeleteNormally I can laugh at most difficult to do prompts and suggestions. However, sonnets make my back teeth grind and just wouldn't do that to myself today. More power to you for attempting it Jules, and it certainly seems you had a good time of it.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/
LOL! well done Jules! I know how hard sonnets are to write - they don't come naturally to me at all! but I do like the way you talk yourself (and us) through one - excellent reading!
ReplyDeleteAdmirably you attempt a form that I have no understanding of. So with that said I think it perfectly captures the humorous side of trying to write. The farce is forced and yet you succeed in finding space on the page to create another jewel. :-)
ReplyDeleteNice, Jules, that you found the self-effacing humor in this sonnet! The rhymes were wonderful, and yes, some is forced, but it's as though you're doing it on purpose, which is perfect and fun.
ReplyDeleteSomeday I'll write a sonnet. It will probably be about the devastation of a drone attack, or my father's perversion. Something subversive, and anything but flowers!!! Thanks for visiting and hipping me to this link. Loved it, loved it. Amy
I have those same feelings every time I try writing a sonnet. I wonder if I'm so intimidated because such grand people wrote them so wonderfully or because they really are that difficult to write so the read like they're natural? Either way, you've captured the trepidation of the attempt just perfectly.
ReplyDelete