Wednesday, August 22, 2012

WWP 119: Pretty Gritty?

Pretty Gritty?
mud
to young girls
nothing better to do
than keep each other company
while the grown-ups held their high tea

mud
in the back
of the yard somewhere
a place we rarely visited
the home our grandfather built to retire

mud
between our toes
we removed our shoes
and made countless dirt pies
covering our sibling selves in the afternoon

mud
they laughed heartily
once they found us
got out the garden hose
when it was time to go home

mud
of a place
now only a memory -
no longer our wonderland
lingering on the fading map of dreams

JP/davh

WWP 119...of what/place
http://wewritepoems.wordpress.com/2012/08/22/prompt-119-its-post-your-poems-day/
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7 comments:

  1. Ms. BeckyAugust 22, 2012 at 10:08 PM

    wow Jules, I LOVE this. especially -

    mud
    of a place
    now only a memory -
    no longer our wonderland
    lingering on the fading map of dreams

    This is truly delicious writing. Happy week to you Jules.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownAugust 23, 2012 at 8:05 AM

    I really identified with this Jules - I LOVED making mud pies as a kid. Made me terribly dirty though which meant I had to have a bath - another treat! Enjoyed the fun throughout this poem and the tolerant amusement of the adults. The last stanza is a lovely counterpoint - full of a gentle sadness and nostalgia...

    ReplyDelete
  3. nanAugust 23, 2012 at 10:24 AM

    I love this, Jules! The one-word, one-syllable repetition of mud is very effective -- fun to read and evocative of the substance itself. This is a fun, fun poem of childhood. Thanks for the smile! If only we could experience mud as wonderland as adults. Maybe we can.

    ReplyDelete
  4. HannahAugust 23, 2012 at 12:02 PM

    Oh, yes!! Jules my mind went to mud first too!! So fun...a lovely reminisce and I too, love your closing stanza! Well written!

    ReplyDelete
  5. ElizabethAugust 23, 2012 at 1:12 PM

    Not at all gritty, Jules. There is almost a dreamlike quality throughout, a very real sense of looking back a long way, seeing flashing moments of recognition. Wonderful write!

    Elizabeth

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  6. my heart's love songsAugust 24, 2012 at 3:34 AM

    this took me back to the joy of making mud pies! the beginning of my love of baking, i guess?

    this was delicious!!!

    ♥

    ReplyDelete
  7. teriAugust 27, 2012 at 12:18 PM

    Great write Jules... so glad I dropped down to see what else you have been up to. It makes me wonder about myself though- I did not like to get dirty, I even had trouble with finger paints. Now I am wondering why?

    ReplyDelete

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