Wednesday, August 8, 2012

WWP 117 Strained? (Elfje Quintet)

An Elfje Quintet:  Strained?

Patient
He, she
All of us
Under whose thoughtful care
Yours?

(Patience
Me, them
Only one rope
Burning at both ends
Ash...)

Patient
Always waiting
Another shoe drops
Naked emotions, paper gowns
Patient

(Fire
Them, me
Brilliant flames flicker
Mesmerized by the dance
Patience)

Mine?
Poked, prodded
Annoyed, yet calm
Then we get billed
Patient

Prompt
http://wewritepoems.wordpress.com/2012/08/02/prompt-117-what-words-mean/
Post prompt here
http://wewritepoems.wordpress.com/2012/08/08/prompt-117-its-post-your-poems-day/#comments
Process notes: I was able to cryptically apply a current situation, with perhaps some humor to this prompt. Suffice it to say that sometimes ‘you’ get what ‘you’ ask for when you are the squeaky wheel (which was not necessarily my own little self) - even if it isn’t exactly what ‘you’ wanted. Perhaps if just a little bit of patience were applied the outcome could have been different.  In the end, there always is a bill to pay...

pa·tient  [pey-shuhnt]   noun

1.a person who is under medical care or treatment. 2.a person or thing that undergoes some action.
3.Archaic . a sufferer or victim.
adjective
4.bearing provocation, annoyance, misfortune, delay, hardship,pain, etc., with fortitude and calm and without complaint,anger, or the like.   5.characterized by or expressing such a quality: a patient smile.
6.quietly and steadily persevering or diligent, especially indetail or exactness: a patient worker.
7.undergoing the action of another ( opposed to agent).

pa·tience  [pey-shuhns]  noun

1.the quality of being patient,  as the bearing of provocation,annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like. 2.an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness orannoyance when confronted with delay: to have patience with a slow learner. 3.quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence:to work with patience.



5 comments:

  1. I particularly like the second stanza, Jules. Patience is such a test of patience. But like the manner is which you structured this and kept including your audience. Clever,

    Elizabeth

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  2. I loved the clever wordplay in this, brilliant execution... minimalist (but that's the elfje style) telling everything. nice one Jules! I will hopefully be back again soon.... and I really will type up my comments on your other works as soon as I'm back to my normal (whatever that is) routine!

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  3. You are an over-acheiver! (in the best way, of course). You shifted the meaning of patient quite a few times in this piece -- and effectively too. BTW, they put all kinds of resources on that fire and contained it pretty quickly. Phew.

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    Replies
    1. I was just playing around. I do have fun with words. Glad all is well with you there!

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  4. This is fantastic! I like the word you chose and what you did with it through the poem.

    ReplyDelete

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